British bacon vs American bacon - the ultimate meat-off

There's no such thing as plain old "bacon". There is British bacon, and there is American bacon, and never the twain shall meet. Here is my case for UK bacon being crowned The One Meat To Rule Them All. 

Why British bacon is better than American bacon

1. It's all meat, baby

American bacon is known as 'streaky bacon', because there are thin streaks of meat between the fat. Sorry, I mean there are streaks of fat between the meat. British bacon is mostly lean meat, with a thin strip of fat at the top call the 'rind'. (Crisp this up and it's extremely tasty, but if you don't like to eat the fat it's a great gift for garden birds trying to struggle through the winter months). This means you get more meat for your money with British bacon and less chance of an early heart attack from coronary blockage. British bacon is also known as back, or side, bacon and is taken from a leaner cut of pork. American bacon is sliced from pork belly, which is why you encounter the layers of fat interspersed with meat.

2. It doesn't weep a giant pool of grease

When you cook American bacon, it cries grease. 'Don't cook me!' It yells, dispersing more grease into the pan than a pack of non-lean Tesco horse mince. Sorry, I meant beef mince. One little strip of bacon produces so much grease that you're left with several unpalatable choices:

• Grill it and let all the grease collect in silver foil in your grill pan, so you have to scoop the disgusterous thing out after it's solidified and be reminded of what's swimming around your body right now
• Fry it and be spat at by an outraged, sizzling meat product
• Give more money to George Foreman and invest in a fat-draining grill

British bacon doesn't have half as much grease as American bacon, because there's only the rind to worry about. In fact, I have been known to use a little cooking oil while frying British bacon to stop it sticking to the pan.

3. It's great for cooking

Because British bacon is a leaner cut of meat, you can wrap it around other creatures like chickens or fish, to make a tasty, crispy shell for the animal you'll be consuming. But wait, that's not all! You can also cut British bacon into thin, meaty squares and add it to basically any dish, from pasta bake to spaghetti bolognese (known as spaghetti in the US) and not have to worry about any marbled fat changing the flavour or texture of your dish.

4. It's just smoked or unsmoked, no random flavours

British bacon comes in two main varieties - smoked or unsmoked. That's it. The smokey flavour of the former variety is an excellent accompaniment to creamy scrambled eggs or wrapped around white fish and chicken. American bacon flavours just don't make sense to me. If you love the subtle, meaty flavour of crispy pork, why would you make it 'candied' by adding honey or molases? 

So that's my case for British bacon, or back bacon, being crowned the One Meat To Rule Them All. My favourite way to cook it is to shallow fry it simply with a little salt and pepper until it's crispy and the rind is crunchy, then serve it with creamy scrambled eggs on wholewheat toast. It's simple but tasty - here's the recipe if you're interested.

And the moral of the story is... everything's better with British bacon.